Only you know what's best for your baby...

Today was just, crazy! I made an amazing discovery after a very frustrating, cross-cultural doctor visit. All I wanted her to do was check my baby's ears and she wouldn't because she didn't have a fever. I was pretty convinced that my little girl had an ear infection. Last night was better, but before that she was waking every hour four nights in a row! She had a runny nose but this didn't seem to be bothering her much when she slept. It was obvious that some sort of pain was waking her and she always wanted to go straight back to sleep. Rarely needing to be nursed back to sleep, just soothed and rocked a little.

Yesterday when she started pulling a bit at her ears I started to feel sure that it was an ear infection. We have an American pediatrician here, but she is in Europe right now so I needed to see a local doctor. I had no idea what an ordeal it would be. I thought since American doctors always check ears that they would too, but I guess you need to go to a specialist for that here and I wasn't allowed to because she didn't have a fever.

I was very upset. I felt stuck. I contacted my amazing lactation consultant/friend/confidant. I love her! I cannot tell you all enough how this woman has changed my life. She has helped to shape my views, but not in a demanding way, she is so gentle and peaceful and loving and supportive. I can't rave enough about her! She told me a simple way to tell if she might have an ear infection and a natural remedy.

When she woke up I was going to check until I noticed something in her mouth. I knew she had been getting her two bottom teeth and thought that if this all was still from teething it seemed crazy. UNTIL I noticed that her two top teeth were poking through!!! OH MY! I couldn't believe that my six month old had this many teeth already coming through! After checking her ears and realizing that there was no sign of infection according to what my LC told me. This really seemed to explain everything! My world seemed happy again! And all the sudden my baby did too! We did the happy dance to this song :)

General timeline of baby teeth eruption and falling out

I don't think she's completely in the clear, but I could tell from her general countenance that she was doing a whole lot better today. She may still be tired from waking up so much the past five nights. But she's been playing on her own practically all day! This hasn't happened since before all this extreme teething stuff.

I remember reading this blog entry from Sweet Madeleine about lies people will tell you about Infant Sleep. She's writing from her experience of breastfeeding her baby to sleep for the first year of life. I have always held onto one thing that she said in that article, she said that there is always, always a reason for babies waking in the night. I am beginning to notice this pattern with Ruth, when she has a bad night, there is ALWAYS a reason! 

Teething face

I do find myself thinking at times, maybe I am doing it all wrong, but don't we all mamas? These thoughts and feelings usually pass and I eventually figure out what was wrong with Ruth or she just naturally starts going back to sleeping good. She is not a perfect sleeper and I feel at peace with the fact that infants are erratic sleepers. A very interesting article in Psychology Today talks about this.

SO, once again, many people will tell you what to do Mama, and it won't always be what is right for your little one. The doctor I went to told me that I needed to start my baby on solids to help her immune system. Sometimes you need to just smile and nod even when you know better. To see what I'm talking about, read this article on introducing solids from Kelly Mom.

Everyone has ideas, some are good, some are bad. But what it really comes down to is you Mama! You know what is best for your little one and you need to decide on that confidently and stick to it. For now I have decided what is best for my little one, there are so many decisions that I will continue to need to make in raising her, but I am super satisfied with the decisions I have made so far with her as a baby which is why I am passionate about sharing the ideas behind many of them.

So do your research mamas and don't be satisfied till you find the way that is best for you and your little one!

Let's be real

Yeah. So I realized yesterday that writing about what is happening is really really good for me. It makes me feel alive. If I can get things out there and just be real it is like sunshine for my soul.

I absolutely love when people tell me that they can relate to what I am writing. My strongest hope for my writings is that they will reach people that need to hear what I'm writing. People that just want something that they can read and go "yeah, I've totally been there!" I hope that they can be something that excite people at times and stir them to action, but also that they can just be something that eases their mind and reminds them that someone else out there is going through the same thing. 

I want to be informative of course and teach people what I am learning, but I also want to be real and just share what I've been facing. To be honest, I've been really afraid of being real. I've been afraid that people would judge my style of parenting if I was real. That they would say, 'see, we told you that you needed to teach your baby to self soothe.' Or something along those terms.

But I'm tired of sitting back and being ashamed of the way that I parent my child. I absolutely love and adore her. I've done lots of research and feel confident in the decisions I have made. I can't be afraid to share the negative parts of being a mom just because people might tell me that I'm doing things wrong.

No matter what you do I can guarantee you that there will be people trying to tell you that you are doing things wrong. So if you are doing something, you have got to do it with confidence. Especially attachment parenting ;) I didn't want to label it, but there it is. I can't tell you how many people and sources will tell you the opposite of what I believe to be right for my sweet little family.

I will not tell you that this is the way to do it for your family. But I will tell you that I am happy and confident with the decision that I have made to do it with my family!

Welcome to the jungle

Hello everyone! I am still alive. barely. Life has been rough lately. Teething babies are not for the faint of heart. Mine has been teething basically since my last blog post which was over a month ago... I was so set on doing things well and consistently with this blog, but never mind that. I have had a teething baby and now a sick baby. Oh the joys of parenthood.

I still feel a lot of joy from it though. That's the funny thing. It encompasses my whole life and I can't do a lot of the things the I used to love doing, But I have found so much joy in the things that I am now doing. That mostly being taking care of a rascally little baby girl. Seriously though, this girl is wild! She NEVER STOPS MOVING!

So I didn't know that being a mom would be so full on, but I also didn't know how much I would love it! I absolutely love it! Every second? No! Haha! She woke up every single hour last night and the night before! She's been sick, so I'm pretty sure that is what it is associated with. It could be teething. Did I get frustrated? Yes! Did I ever not want to come to her rescue? No way! I love being the one. I love that she needs ME.

I had a hard time with that at first. I thought she should be more independent. Should be able to sleep without being comforted. I had ideas that came from other people, books, doctors. But now, I understand how I want to do it. How I want to be there for her no matter what.

It was so sad to see her sick this weekend, but one amazing thing that I realized is how much she needs ME. That was a first. She didn't want her daddy in the middle of the night. As much as I want him to be able to comfort her and I know he will be able to more in the future. He just wasn't cutting it for her when she was sick. She didn't need to be breast fed at the time. She just needed her mommy's loving arms to rock her to sleep. It was a beautiful feeling to be the ONE. I have wanted this for so long.

Oh what a precious and fleeting thing motherhood is. I am only in the beginning but I already realize how quickly it flies by. Don't get me wrong, I know that I will forever be a mother now, that this little girl will forever be etched on my heart, but these days when they are little are short! I sometimes miss those newborn days. Things were simpler. She was tiny and easy to put to sleep ;) Now she is much bigger and more distractible. But she is SO MUCH FUN!

It's really fun to watch them grow, but I have heard so many people say to enjoy these days while they last, though at times they can be very difficult to enjoy. But despite all of the hard times I really strive to embrace this jungle that I am in now. It feels endless. It feels thick and all encompassing, but it's fleeting. Her giggles and her smiles and her new developments every day, they will slow down and she will normalize and equalize and become easier. But she will never be the little person that she is now again. So I just want to enjoy it while it lasts.